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“Jeepers Creepers” or “The Worst Night I Had in MineCraft”

May 6, 2011 6 comments

Last night playing MineCraft solo, I had the worst experience of my life. For those of you who don’t know what MineCraft is, get a friend to help you with that rock you’re stuck under. Granted I too got into MineCraft relatively recently, but at least I knew about it. The point is that anyone who plays MineCraft knows that ‘learning how to play’ is an iterative process. There are no win or lose conditions, there is no ‘right’ way to play (although I suppose if you are perpetually getting blown up by Creepers, you are doing something wrong!), and the game is exactly and precisely what you want it to be.

A Brave New World

I had started a new world. I wanted to build the most elaborate mines ever created, but the first step was to build a safe and secure hideout on the surface. So I built a 5×10 living space over the course of three days (and nights). It started as a small 3×4 space, that I kept adding to till I got what I wanted. It was made entirely out of wooden planks, with sand acting as flooring. I eventually added a few glass cubes to the outer walls and converted a 3×6 section in the middle of the roof into glass as well, so I would always know when night had fallen.

I built a mine entrance in one of the walls, padded the outside of it with stone so it looked like a natural mine digsite, and dug diagonally down, lining the path with stone and wood steps, all the way to about a height of 15 or so above the bedrock. I have yet to encounter slimes in the world, but I didn’t feel like dealing with that nonsense just yet.

A few days later I saw a video of someone building a massive mob trap for anything around his house using a clever combination of directional water, lava and cactus traps, and glass dividers. I decided I eventually wanted to do the same and dug out a 2×2 area inside my house to create an infinite water supply point. Once that was filled, I though to myself, why not build an infinite lava supply as well that could double as an incinerator? So in the corner opposite the water supply point, I dug a 2×2 hole for lava. I took two buckets down into the mine and tapped a lava vein to bring back up.

Then I poured lava into the hole and thus started my worst night in MineCraft.

Darkness, Creepers and Fire

It was night time when I poured lava into that hole, not realizing that it was adjacent to wooden walls in the corner. A few moments later, as I had my back to the lava pool, putting new iron ore into the furnace for some hot, smelting action, I heard something sizzle and pop behind me. I turned around. The entire northern wall of my house was gone, only the glass cubes remained, and fire was quickly spreading both along the eastern and western walls. I had a ton of stone and sand on me from some excavation I had conducted just prior to sunset, so I quickly rushed to the spot and first plugged the lava hole.

By this point parts of the ceiling were on fire. As soon as I turned left to start replacing that wall and put out the fire by simply closing off the faces of the wood blocks that were aflame, I get hit in the chest by an arrow. A bow and arrow are hot-keyed to my “7” key, so I take that out, and machine-gun fire arrows at the skeleton till it goes down.

But now I have only two hearts left. The house is built so I can get to the ceiling by climbing on the mine outside. So I run out, hoping to avoid any more monsters and frantically try to climb up the side, only to realize that the base wooden blocks are burnt down, so I can’t get up on the mine. It doesn’t even occur to me to create a temporary set of stepping stones to get to the top. half of my house is gone and it’s the middle of the night and I am panicking. Of course that is when my speakers decide to announce the presence of a Creeper with a fateful “hissss” and the next thing I know, a big respawn button has appeared in the middle of my screen.

I respawn inside my house, and rush back out so I can recover everything I was carrying when I got ambushed by the bastard. There is a giant crater with my stuff strewn about every which way. I frantically gather up everything, including my diamond tools and a ton of accumulated diamonds that I intended to craft armor with. As I turn around in the hole to grab something else, I see a Creeper, perhaps six blocks from me, descending into the hole, coming straight at me. I panic-pedal backwards, but the hole is steep. I turn around to find a ledge to jump on to try and get away, and the Creeper explodes just as I get a three block advantage on him. I don’t die this time, but I get seriously maimed.

Of course as I come out of the hole with half a beating heart, I hear the tell-tale groan of  zombie and I die before I can even turn to trace the groan’s source. I respawn inside the house again, which is a relative term, since the house was effective burnt to the ground. But this time I open my blocks chest, extract two 64 piles of stone and a door and build a temporary shelter immediately around me, two blocks high, in the shape of a U, 3×2 blocks on the floor. I stand at one edge of the U, and place a door on the other edge. And then I just wait the night out.

Fortunately by the time it was daylight my stuff had not despawned, and I was able to recover a good bit of it, but that still remains one of the worst situations I have been in MineCraft, a horrendous ordeal I wouldn’t wish upon my worst enemy.

What has been your worst MineCraft memory?

Categories: MineCraft

“Ezio, Altair; Altair, Ezio” or “Assassin’s Creed Revelations is Full of Multigenerational Madness”

Well there you have it. Less than 48 hours after I put up a post predicting that Ezio and Altair will both be in the next game, that it will have something to do with Constantinople in the early-16th century and the story will jump in time a lot, we have the official announcement.

Assassin’s Creed: Revelations will conclude the Ezio trilogy. A trilogy within a trilogy? You don’t say! I do say. And this latest venture takes Ezio to Constantinople (modern day Istanbul in Turkey) during the rise of the Ottoman Empire. You will get to play as Altair in the 12th century, Ezio in the 16th century and Desmond in modern times, bringing together the three heroes in the same title for the first time since the prolific franchise launched.

Nintendo Tim, a commenter on the reveal story over at Joystiq perfectly phrased my thoughts on what one cool aspect of intersecting timeslines may be:

Imagine that, as Desmond, you’re in a desolate, nearly destroyed building that houses an artifact (Codex page, perhaps?) that was placed there before Ezio’s time, but after Altaïr; you can’t make hide-nor-head of what goes where in the building. Ezio’s version of the puzzle has the building in near-perfect condition, but a runic puzzle to access the artifact has been vandalized, possibly by the Templars who couldn’t solve it. Go back as Altaïr, find the runes and make note of them, come back as Ezio, solve the puzzle, locate the artiact, add it to the collection, and Desmond has his information.

It’s like a dual-world idea without the terrible dark/light aspect, just “old” and “older” versions of the same place.

Aaaaaaaand goosebumps!