Archive for March 9, 2010

“Eli Roth Would be Proud” or “Dismembershiposity”

March 9, 2010 Leave a comment

Through the Book of the Face, comes this new contest by Visceral Games regarding their upcoming sequel to Dead Space.

The contest is simple: you need to design a dismemberment in Dead Space 2. The contest is open to anyone, regardless of background, though if you are a serial killer, you probably have a better chance at this sort of thing.

The entry can be submitted as a video of Isaac Clarke dismembering a slasher, lurker or reaper, a drawing, a verbal explanation, or pretty much anything you can come up with. The winning entry will be voted on by the community, and will be animated for the game, along with the likeness for the contest winner.

The contest will go till midnight, March 26, 2010. Additional details an be found here .

Looking for inspiration? Check out Hostel and Hostel 2. If you’re criminally insane. Or severely disturbed. Or you’re Eli Roth.

Categories: Contest, Opinion

“My Gun Has a Bigger Clip Than Yours” or “Kill Big Planet”

March 9, 2010 1 comment

Dear. Lord. Big guns. BigĀ  dropships. Big trains. Big mechs. Big beasts. In fact, everything about Lost Planet is big, even the trailer below, which is a whopping 4+ minutes long. I never played the first one, but this trailer has certainly sparked my curiosity.

One word of caution though, claiming that you ‘utilize the latest in MT Framework 2.0 technology’, doesn’t tell me jack, and only makes you come across as a jackass. Utilize that.

Categories: Uncategorized

“Cooperatively Tomb Raiding” or “Croft and Amazon, Sitting in a Tree…”

March 9, 2010 1 comment

Name Change?

The new Lara Croft game has been announced. Not the new Tomb Raider game. The new Lara Croft game. They have decided to drop the ‘Tomb Raider’ part from the name altogether. I postulate one of the following reason for it:

  • Lara is no longer raiding tombs. She is adopting kids from around the world along with her life partner, Detective David Mills. See what I did ‘dere?
  • “Tomb Raider: Lara Croft” just sounds a little too tedious. “Lara Croft: Guardian of the Light” is a shorter and rolls off of the tongue better. Wait…
  • Simon West or Jan de Bont threatened to sue.
  • They’re trying to ‘reinvent themselves’. *rolls eyes*

3D Platformer?

The new game will be playable in a 3D top-down perspective. Why? Again I postulate the following:

  • They’re beginning to sag, so a distant perspective is being used as means to hide the work of gravity.
  • The studio is out of money and can’t afford a proper, 3D boobs.
  • The studio realized that given Lara’s ‘assets’, staring at her butt the whole game was probably not the most prudent perspective choice
  • They’re trying to ‘reinvent themselves’. *rolls eyes*


You will also be able to play coorperatively. Who will be the brave soul crazy enough to fill boots raiding tombs Lara Crofting alongside, uh, Lara Croft? I don’t have a list of hypothesized reasons for this question because I know the answer. From the screenshots, it is obvious that Lara’s sidekick is no other than Amazon from Diablo 2.

Stay tuned for additional details to pop up about this new venture!

Categories: Uncategorized

“Doesn’t Make me Want to Switch to Geico” or “More of the Same?”

March 9, 2010 Leave a comment

Several Fallout: New Vegas screenshots are out, courtesy of Duck and Cover. Looks interesting, but more of the same.


Categories: Fallout